Tuesday, June 17, 2014

Random Acts Of Kindness?

Okay, this is going to be a weird post. I can feel it in my bones. In fact, I almost skipped this part of the blog challenge I'm doing because I realized it was going to be such a weird post!

The thing is, even though I try to live my life peacefully and in balance with all... random acts of kindness as most people know it have been taken out of my life all together. No, I didn't decide to not be a decent person. I decided I was so tired of being used. And when I lived every day helping everyone I could... that is ALL that ever happened. I'm going to compose a short list.

On one occasion my neighbor came to me in a panic, begging to borrow my car because her son was sick and his doctor was all the way in the city (this was before I moved to the city). I felt bad for her and loaned her my car. She was promptly gone all day long and when I went to clean out the car the next day I found a spoon with the bottom burned on it in the back of my car. I was so mad. I couldn't believe they used me like that!

Another time I had a neighbor that was always coming by and asking for food. I kept giving her food and giving her food until I realized that I just couldn't keep doing this or I'd starve. Finally I took her down to the local rescue mission so she could get some food assistance. I continued to do this once a month, every month for about a year. One day my landlady called me into her often to ask me if I was using crack. My jaw dropped to the floor and I asked if she was blind much because I'm overweight. She said that the police had been called on that neighbor and she was caught with the drugs in her house and in her system and she needed to know I wasn't using as well.

This will be the last example for this post, I promise. Right after my brother passed away my whole family was going through a rough patch. My Mom finally decided that it would help myself and my sister out as a symbiotic relationship if my sister moved in with me. We agreed that this would be helpful. I'm level headed and nerdy. My sister is a clean freak. We might be able to balance each other out nicely. Anyhow, my sister had a boyfriend that she wanted to stay with her... in my house. At first I figured that a night or two wouldn't hurt. Until he started inviting people over in the middle of the night and getting into fights with them while I was in bed. I told him he had to go. But, he moved all his stuff into my house! I was in college at the time and still upset about losing my brother in my own home. I didn't want the police involved since I figured they would come to see my house as 'that house'. So, every day I would pack up all his stuff in trash bags and put it on my porch. Every night when I got home from school it would all be back in my sister's room. He went around telling all his friends that it was his house so when I would tell his friends to leave they would laugh at me and ask what right I had to tell them to leave. It was a nightmare... more happened than that, but I'm pretty sure you get the picture.

After I ended up losing EVERYTHING, I came to the point where I realized that I can't put myself out there to help people anymore. Every now and then if someone needs some little item that I can help them with... I will help. Someone needs a hair tie for their kid? I have an extra. Their cell phone just died on them. I might have an old one they can use. Those kinds of things I'm happy to do. But, I will never put my own reputation on the line to help a person out again. If there is any way that I could be harmed by helping a person I simply won't do it. I'll tell them where to find the help they need and leave the issue at that.

So, my lovelies... can you share about your own experiences with random acts of kindness?

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